Friday, July 30, 2010

Saint Diego. Part 1.

Miss me?  Yeah, I missed you too.  COMMENCE BULLET POINTS
  • I figured out why you aren't supposed to drink the water in Mexico.  Because it's too close to California.
  • I'm going to break up the next few blog posts to be about the Comic Con.  Not just because we did a lot of things, but because Portland is very boring and sunny with nothing to blog about after Comic Con.
  • Seriously, what is UP with the water in California?  It's got this milky texture.  Milky water make your foot fall off. 
The drive down was nice enough for a 20 hour drive.  We had the sleeping beauties in the back for a while.

But did you know when you drive a whole day for 20 hours that the day seems like a bust?  What?  It's WEDNESDAY?  You mean all we did on Tuesday was drive?

I finally ate at In-N-Out Burger.  Yes, it was delicious.

Hayley and Sarah were fantastic about buying groceries for the trip down.  Did I mention we were carpooling with two other people?  Well, now you know.  They brought those little packs of cereal, but we had no milk!  WHAT TO DO?  So I went into a McDonald's to buy a kid's milk and creepily asked for a spoon and cup.   "Just a milk, by itself?...That's it?"  And then I came back inside to go pee, and on my way out a woman said "Excuse me."  I paused for a second, knowing she couldn't be talking to anyone else and turned around.  "Would you like a sandwich?"  Long pause.  "Sure!"  She then explained they didn't want it go to waste.  Their son got all into telling me the story.  "Yeah!  I only ordered one chicken sandwich, and they gave me TWO and now we have an extra one!"  We both drove away at the same time and the boy waved at me.  But for some reason Jesse wasn't as enthused as I was about me accepting this chicken sandwich from strangers.  Like In-N-Out, it was delicious, but better, because it was free.

Okay, and then just remember I was in the car for a really long time.

The next day Roger and Shawn flew in from Georgia so we went out with them while Hayley and Sarah slept until 1pm.  This was Shawn's third year at Comic Con and he was so handy!  We farted around all afternoon and then went to preview night.  After that we watched a guy get arrested.  Proceed to story.

We were walking to Jack in the Box with all of our Comic Con paraphernalia and cameras so that no one would mistake us for tourists, when we saw a helicopter in the distance with a SPOTLIGHT like in the MOVIES!  We commented on this, while it moved closer to us, and then on top of us.  Followed by sirens and then a really really loud BANG!  But since we were at Comic Con it could have also been a KAPLOOEY or WHAMMO.  I started to back that butt up in case said "bang" was a, you know, gun.  I am from the westside and all.  And then some guy walks into the middle of the street with his hands up, the cops speed up to where we are, and arrest him. After further walking, we saw he had driven around the corner and smashed his truck into a transformer.  It was not Optimus Prime, don't worry.

And I was expecting the cops to give us a hard time, telling us to go around and all.  But you know what they did?  "Oh, did Comic Con start tonight?  How's that going?" Never mind the smashed truck in front of us, how is your vacation?

The next day we saw Seth Green.  But I'm used to not seeing celebrities, so it was more like "That guy looks like Seth Green.  But he's so little!"  And then...oh, and then my friends.  I saw Claudio from the band Coheed and Cambria.

I saw him on the then-reasonable floor of the convention center (read: before 120,000 people had access to it) and stalked him and his wife for a bit.  I called Jesse and said "CLAUDIO SANCHEZ IS RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!" as I hid behind a pole from his view, and Jesse said "I'M LOOKING AT MIKE MIGNOLA!"  It was a beautiful moment between a married couple on opposite sides of Comic Con.  I followed him for a few minutes before tentatively saying "...Claudio?"  And let me tell you he is SO NICE!  His music is the type of genre where they're usually drunk and mean at their concerts, but they seemed like the nicest guys who took what they did seriously, and it goes for his real life too.  His wife immediately put out her hand to take a picture of us (and she is a HOTTIE, let me tell you!).

That's not the original picture of me and him, because we saw them again at the Hilton when Jesse was with me.  I mean, we were bothering these people on their vacation at their hotel and they were nice as can be.

Okay, well... The other days kind of run into each other so it will be three parts.  Sneak peek numero uno, aka "zombie meet my neck meat":

Ron Burgundy: Discovered by the Germans in 1904, they named it San Diego, which of course in German means a whale's vagina.
Veronica Corningstone: No, there's no way that's correct.
Ron Burgundy: I'm sorry, I was trying to impress you. I don't know what it means. I'll be honest, I don't think anyone knows what it means anymore. Scholars maintain that the translation was lost hundreds of years ago.
Veronica Corningstone: Doesn't it mean Saint Diego?
Ron Burgundy: No. No.
Veronica Corningstone: No, that's - that's what it means. Really.
Ron Burgundy: Agree to disagree.


  1. Geez, your post was star-studded! Seth Green, Coheed and Cambria, Ron Burgundy, I guess you're too big-time for us little people, now.

  2. That photo is great! Is he drinking an iced coffee from Starbucks?

  3. I do so love that stupid brilliant quote from that stupid hilarious movie.

    And In and Out Burgers are one of God's finest treasures.

    I saw Mark Anthony and his other wife, before Jlo once. I was shocked at how wimpy he was. His shoulders were no bigger than mine and mine are about the size of a 7-year-old's. He looked like Skeletor. Very ugly, too. His wife was gorgeous.


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