Monday, February 28, 2011

Justice is blind.

Veterinarian: Justice is fine.
Michael : Great.
Veterinarian: Although, dressing him up like a seeing eye dog seems a bit cruel.
Michael: Cruel?
Veterinarian: Well, yeah because he can't see.
Michael: What are you talking about?
Veterinarian: Mr. Bluth... Justice is blind.

The last time I went to jury duty, I got interviewed for a jury.  They were asking all these questions and then they'd look at their sheet and be like "Mmmmm, Mister So-and-so?  How do you feel about that?" and I would go, oh crap, I gotta pay attention, I have NO IDEA what they just asked.  And then a minute later I'd hear them ask another juror what they thought and then repeat my last reaction.  It was a fun morning.

Then we got released for a long lunch which helped me a lot seeing as I didn't live on that side of town.  But my eye had been killing me all morning.  So I went out to Ford Escort #2, pulled out my contact and saw a huge rip in it.  For those not contact savvy, that means the contact had an early death.

Now, this may surprise some of you, but I have horrible vision.  Jesse likes to play the game "Can Katie See My Expression" if I'm not wearing glasses or contacts.  Or, more funly "Can Katie Read That Giant Sign With The Huge Letters What's Wrong With Her She Is Lame".  So going with one contact the rest of the afternoon was exciting to say the least.  Oh, and they didn't choose me for the jury.  But I will always remember (I hate when people say that, "I will always remember ____".  And here I am) the look on the lady's face in the front row of potential jurors.  They started releasing jurors they didn't want, from left to right, front to back row.  They let everybody but one woman out of the front row and I remember when they got to about the third row, she looked back and realized they were letting people go systematically and that she had been selected.  Oh, that look of horror on her face.  It was beautiful.

Anyway, I was sent home again last Friday and I got a lot of reading done.  Oh, BUT KNITTING NEEDLES WEREN'T ALLOWED!  I know, right?  I wasn't sure about crochet hooks, but my crochet chops aren't up to making anything more than those flower fridgies I made a while ago.  Have I been all over the place with this post?  Sorry.

I have no new pictures to show you, so I will post one of my favorite pictures ever.  It's from the World Beard and Mustache Championships, and I want to have an 8x10 print of it made and framed for my house.  More details later.

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

"Get rid of the Seaward." "I'll leave when I'm good and ready."

I love that after my last post where I wrote the word "broshay" that people in the comments changed it to "brochay", with a c.

Enter soap box.

The letter C is a useless letter.  Hear me out.  It does nothing S and K can't handle.  Am I right or am I right?  S does not make a hard K sound.  K does not make a slithery S sound.  Why must C be that way, confusing us with its alphabet wiles?  Konfusing us.  Komments.  Selery.  Selebrate.  I fear this is a problem with no answer, which saddens me.

I am saddened.

Anyway, I have jury duty on Friday.

Which doesn't help the sadness.

There is a book I'm dying to finish and fingerless gloves Jesse is impatiently waiting for me to knit.  Perhaps I'll get some quality personal time in at the good old Washington County while fulfilling my civic duty.  Unlike Dawn in Austin, who I know is very angry I have jury duty when she is just dying to get called in.

Also, very exciting news at House of Twelvedaysold.  Stalker Angie over at I Stalk Knitters is following me!  Which I love because I stalk Stalker Angie.  It's a perfect match.  Or maybe a self destructive one that will end in a restraining order.

Stay cool while I am off delivering justice.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

The broshay.

The mystery follower incident has been solved.  It appears Jenna had to create another account to add me to her google reader, making her like the number 6 follower and also number 41.  Let us not forget that I follow my own blog as well.

The Furry Godmother also started following me, and I am a big fan of hers.  Her dog Simone is always looking at me through the computer screen saying, "Please take me away and cuddle me forever.  Even though my parents throw me birthday parties and you wouldn't."  You guys are great with those parties.  Poor Cinnamon just gets me shoving my face in his belly going "HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" and then opening a can of Fancy Feast.  Conveniently, this is also how I celebrate Jesse's birthday.

Susan from Live Lightly, Laugh Often also started following me.  Go check out the pretty pictures that are her header and background.  Her and her husband are remodeling their house and I want PICTURES.  Wow.  I just went to her blog and she has a whole tab dedicated to their house.  I feel like a tool.

On to other items of business.

Once I was at the mall with my sisters and brother-in-law.  Now, this is the Pony Village Mall in Coos Bay, Oregon, meaning, this mall is jank.  I think JC Penney was able to stay in business, but everything else constantly had a going out of business sign except for the attached Dollar Tree and Army recruitment guys.  Not that the Army recruitment guys would have a going out of business sign.  They would have more of a "try the Marines next door" type of thing.

Recently I was at my parents' house and Mom had copies of a questionnaire that each member of the family had filled out back in the Coos Bay days.  Do you know where my favorite place to hang out was, on that list?


Wait for it...

WALMART.  Didn't see that coming, did you.  Unless you are Jesse, because I have extensively gone over why the Walmart was better than the mall in Coos Bay.  The Walmart there was awesome.  I'm receding into myself talking about this so I'm going to move forward to the story.

So hanging out at the Po-nay Village, my sister and her husband said something along the lines of, "Look at that new gym right there.  I wonder how much it costs."  And I said, "I'll go check."  Now, my other sister Susan tells me she was there with me when this happened, but I have a bad memory and change facts, so here's my story instead.  I was alone.

As I walked up to the counter, I told myself I would just ask for a broshay that included their prices.  A broshay? I asked myself.  Yeah... that's right.  Broshay.  The guy at the counter was a big beefy guy with minimal neckage and wearing ear buds.

"Could I have a broshay?"

Blink.  "What?"

"A broshay."  Duh.

Blank stare.  He points into the mall.  "The guy who's normally is here buying some socks right now, so..."

"... ...Okay, thanks,"  I said as I rolled my eyes and thought moron.

And then.  Oh no.  BROCHURE. 

Cinnafluff and Jesse:

And happy birthday, Madre!  I love you whole bunches.  Enjoy the very thoughtful gift certificate I emailed to you.

Monday, February 7, 2011


Hey, I've reached 41 followers!  Interestingly, my 40th follower is Pepe Le Pew, which is somewhat surprising because I didn't know he had opposable thumbs.

That joke was terrible.

I'm also puzzled because I can't seem to find who the 41st follower is.  Is it normal to be fretting about this?

Last night we went and picked up the first season of Hoarders from the library.  You would have been embarrassed how excited I was to watch that show.  Jesse was all 'ok fine' (insert eye roll) about the whole thing, because he wanted to get started on the Long Way Down because it has motorcycles and is manly.

So, Hoarders starts out with showing images of the houses in question, and then gets to the whole HOARDERS creepy, yet poignant, logo.  This clip maybe lasts 20, 25 seconds.  Within that 20 or 25 seconds before the title of the first episode, Jesse mentioned that our living room wasn't that messy, and then YES IT WAS and he was already up and grabbing stuff before the title.

Don't get me wrong, I'm sure I wanted to watch it as added motivation to clean the house.  But I really just wanted to enjoy a nice, relaxing evening on the couch thinking about how wonderful it is not to have a totally scary hoarder house.  But there goes Jesse making me put all my clothes away in between watching four (4) episodes of Hoarders.

Do you like how pink Jesse's floating head is in that shot?  The totally ridiculous thing is that I cut him out of the picture for my own floating head, which hellur, I could have used the same one so we both had that awkward up-the-neck style shot.  I mean, do you know how much of my neck I have to cut out of that picture?  You just couldn't understand.

Cinnamon under the covers:

I realized that I've never taken a picture of Cinnamon doing his most favorite thing in the world, which is sleeping under the covers with us.  And I love how he eventually scoots up to where his adorable kitty head is on the pillow.  It's a hard scene to catch because he won't stay under the covers if we aren't there, and usually I'm indecently dressed in bed and would rather not post those images on the internet for everyone and my mom to see.  Because I'm classy like that.

Okay bye.